Cultivation

You are now in a relationship. How will you – mentor and mentee – grow and maintain your relationship? As is the case with any type of relationship, if you are not intentional about what type of attention you give it, it will not grow or sometimes it will grow without you. 

This can be one of the most difficult stages. Questions to ask yourself:

• Do you feel that you know each other very well?
• Are your initial agreements with each other the same?
• Have you co-created a way to have dialogue with each other?
• Do you need to revise this?
• Have you created an environment that welcomes questions and honest answers?
• Have you or your interest (research, program, for example) changed?
• If so, have you shared this change?

To cultivate a relationship is to return to both the reflection and initiation stages to determine if your expectations about the relationship, program, research, and/or progress are realistic and/or feasible.  Whatever your answer, now is the time to commit to at least one monthly meeting to not lose sight of steps you need to take.

How long does this stage last? Trust is the foundation of every relationship. It develops slowly and from being able to, for example, honestly say what is needed/wanted. It deepens as each person becomes comfortable with revealing and sharing parts of their personal and professional selves, and where/how they intersect. Without trust, the stage of mentoring will not be successful. To cultivate a relationship, you must communicate.